International Businessman of Leisure
Welcome, and thank you for purchasing this informative book on paper. This book / pamphlet will teach you the following:
- How to interact with people of different ethnicities.
- How to learn from and cooperate with individuals that are not yourself.
- How to accomplish mission-oriented objectives in a cost-effective just-in-time e-commerce marketplace.
- And possibly, how to tame a wild cougar. Ha ha ha, I’m being metaphorical of course.
This section of the IBL deals with the Americas. That is, people living in the United States.
With the modern global economic climate it is important to remember the American plays the vital role in the success or failure of the world. As many American pop stars once sang, “We are the world.” For all the American knows, he is the entirety of the world. There is no land greater the rolling plains of the mid-west to the American businessman.
The American is generally peaceful, believing the world outside his own country to be inhabited by people whose only wish is to be a part of the great experiment in democracy that is America. Any attempt to show alien influence in the great American system angers the American, forcing him to destroy logic in his attempt to prove that American invention and intuition began the American way of life. Beware of using logic against an American; logic is weak and can prove nothing.
Above all, most Americans simply don’t think about the outside world. It’s as if everyone in the world picked up and moved to Montana, never to be heard from again. There is no general care for the outside world, because the outside world just doesn’t matter.
And, of course, the American is right. The only thing that matters is American ingenuity, paving the way for the huddled masses of the world. Don’t give us your thanks, just a little respect and the admission that we completely rule and you, in fact, drool. Is that really so hard? IS IT! AMERICA AMERICA AMERICA! WOO-YEAH!
We hope that you have found this lesson in dealing with the American both informative and useful.
-Daniel Larsen, United States Correspondant, IBL